


Comme la Plume d'un Oiseau

by KarnagePhoenix



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Boys Kissing, Feelings, First Kiss, Fluff, Incest, Innocence, Introspection, Introspective Sam Winchester, Kissing, M/M, Metaphors, Poetic, Sam Winchester Loves Dean Winchester, might be a little depressing, weencest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-20
Updated: 2019-10-20
Packaged: 2020-12-27 05:05:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,254
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21113132
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KarnagePhoenix/pseuds/KarnagePhoenix
Summary: Thing is, in his idealized version of the history, he and Dean always were meant to be side by side. In an endless road together. Watching like some witnesses the world passing before their eyes, through the window. Never really a part of it, just some oddity in this univers, this dull and ungrateful univers.





	Comme la Plume d'un Oiseau

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone, 
> 
> Hope you'll enjoy this. French author here, so if there is grammar mistake, please, tell me !

Sam doesn’t really know when it started. He doesn’t really want to neither. Thing is, in his idealized version of the history, he and Dean always were meant to be side by side. In an endless road together. Watching like some witnesses the world passing before their eyes, through the window. Never really a part of it, just some oddity in this univers, this dull and ungrateful univers.

When he was young, a kid then a teenager, when he couldn’t explain yet why this reality was so unfair, when all he knew was the rumble of his dad’s car, the scent of leather and the taste of can food, he would get so angry. Witnessing a world he would never be part of. Watching with envy kids at school talking about family weekend, summer camp, holidays with grandparents. Sam didn’t even have a mom. All he had was his dad and Dean.

See ? Sam doesn’t really know when it started. Because it was pure. In this infinity of darkness, of pain, of sorrow and blood, it was purity. The way his brother could light his mood just with a joke or a smile. Or the way he could make the day just better. In this world where he sometime couldn’t feel a damn thing, Dean… Dean was his evening star, showing the way until the morning rises again above his head.

So the first time, while Dean was grunting under the broken heater in the motel room, the first time the thought brushed his mind that it would feel good to kiss his brother, Sam… didn’t really paid attention. It was such a natural thing. A continuity to the bond they already shared. It was meant to be. As light as a bird’s feather, the thought fled outside his head and he just turned his attention to his task : finding all the stylistic devices in his text for his literature teacher.

It happened again, randomly over the months. While Sam was in verge of falling asleep. When Dean was laughing with him about some childish joke. When Dean was sweaty and bloody after a hunt. When Dean was angry and screaming at him. When Dean was lost in his own mind, thinking about things Sam would never know. When Dean was happy, when he was sad, frustrated, asleep, drunk, stoned, surprised. It happened a lot. So much that it just became another part of Sam, one of these constant that shaped him. Sam wanted to kiss his brother, and he couldn’t see what could probably be wrong with that fact.

Years later, the world keeps trying to fall. And the Winchesters keep trying to save it. Sam lost so much over theses years. His love, his mind, his brother. Everything that matters to him at some point, he lost it to this awful life. Indeed, every morning the sun is rising above his head, and every morning Dean wakes up. They are old now, Sam can feel it in his bones, in his soul. His body is getting old, and his mind is exhausted. Dean must feel the same, if all his sights lately are any indication.

Sometime he misses the life on the road. The bunker is great, and Dean loves it, loves to have a place to return. But for Sam… The Impala is a way to always keep rolling, running from everything. With the Bunker… He sometime feel trapped and paranoid inside those walls and those lightless rooms. Sometime… he misses waking up in his seat while the sun is rising in the horizon and Dean is driving peacefully. He always loved to wake up and see his brother’s profile in the morning light. It highlight his lips, curling softly. And he would look at all these freckles, just like stars or golden dust. When Dean wakes up in the bunker, the artificial light just gives him a grim look and makes the dark circles under his eyes darker…

Years later, Sam still wants to kiss his brother. Except he knows he shouldn’t now. He doesn’t really care. Lately, less and less seems to matter in his mind. But Dean still matters, and his longing remains while everything is falling apart. It strikes him while he is in town, shopping. Outside, the rain just stoped and sunny rays make the wet leaves shining.

It strikes him as he’s paying for his food and it doesn’t leave his head during the whole ride back to the bunker. How could it leave his mind ? He’s juste being hit by revelation. He drives fast, not caring for the slippery road.

When he arrives, he doesn’t want to do this in the bunker, where the neon lights make them look sick. He calls Dean and asks him to meet him outside. He waits and waits and waits and seems to wait an eternity before Deam open the door, looking annoyed to be distracted. He rises un eyebrow at Sam, asking silently _what the fuck dude ? Why did you want me to meet you outside ? _

Sam smiles. It’s all in front of him. The naked truth of his life, wearing old jeans and ratty shirt. Smelling like laundry and beer. Hair mussed. Lips chapped. Dean.

Sam put his hands on his elbows and pulls him in. Dean cames, startled, but trusting. Sam cradled his head with one of his bigs hands. Fingers damps because of the air. He brushes it against his skin, wondering if maybe his freckles will start to shine like the evening star in a dark night. His heart is pounding. Dean’s eyes are huge, wondering. His fair lashes blinking. He looks at Sam and must see something grounding because he closes his eyes and just wait, lips parted, breathing short. Sam leans in, he wants to stretches this moment forever. To engrave it in the infinity and never let it slip away like all the memory irremediably does. Sam leans in and his lips brush against Dean’s, as light as a bird’s feather. He exhales against Dean’s parted lips and feels his brother doing the same. It’s exhilarating. The cold breeze on his skin contrasts with the damp heat of Dean. His lips slot so perfectly against his. His tong a little shy, a little daring, just like Sam imagined and so much more. He sights through his nose and embraces his brother tighter, his whole body covering his. Hands on his back and on his neck, guiding him. His mouth opens a little wider, and Dean’s follows his lead, tilting his head to accommodate Sam’s size and his insistent lips. His neck stretches a little and Sam knows he wants to put his hand here and feel his brother heart pulsing on his fingers. He want to melt with him and became one, just the two of them. He wants the word to swallows them, right here, right now. He wants the world to never end and let them stay like that forever. He wants so much it hurt. He understands he has just opened Pandora’s boxe and he doesn’t want to close it. Never. It feels so good he could cry, but he doesn't, just keep kissing his brother with all he has. Heart, mind, body, soul. Everything, he wants to give everything. 

Kissing Dean, it feels like coming home, it feels like breathing again after drowning, it feels like morning rising above his head while the evening star is still shining. It feels like it was meant to be.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading. Hope there isn't too many mistake. 
> 
> See you soon, maybe ? 
> 
> Karnage.


End file.
